Funny Times

I think we are pretty good at are job. But we make mistakes sometimes are at times we just don't care. So here the top 5 funniest moments that take place out in sector that stick out in my mind.

Doing a patrol I'm the truck commander for the lead Humvee. There is these big barriers ahead, my driver is heading right for them. I tell him to "push left," Well he doesn't push left, so the gunner and I start yelling it "PUSH LEFT" BAM!!! Hits the barrier on my side, rippen all the armour off my door and the back door, glass all over me. The drivers excuses, "I did not see it, I was to scared to drive off the road, I thought you meant go left out in to the middle of the desert." Was not funny at the time but now it is. He does not drive anymore.

Doing a raid on a house, My squad leader tells one of my team members to kick open the gate. Well he tried and bounced back almost falling to the ground, I remember . His excuse "I kicked it with the wrong leg." Right.

The Iraqi Police officer had this truck stopped in are way, so I radio back to my squad leader "hey my dismounts are getting out to get this truck out the way." Well the Humvee starts moving, I'm like "what the fuck!!!" I look right nobody is in the drivers seat. I start yelling "hey stop the Humvee!!!" Ahead of us is a dirt mound with C wire running along the top of it, I got scared. The driver tried to run in the Humvee but the door hit the back of the truck closing it. With all my gear on there is no way I'm going to climb out my seat and squeeze in to the drivers seat to step on the break. My gunner gets body armour gets caught so he is stuck. But the driver stopped the Humvee in time. I started to yell "who the hell told you to get out the Humvee." Not funny at the time, but laugh about it now.

So we ride in Bradley's (just Imagine a Tank) in the city and they drop us off so we can do are patrol. Well after 3 hours of walking around they radio us, "Hey we broke track." So we walk over there, all of us are dripping wet because its like 100 plus out and its night time. So we are were trying to put the track back on in the middle of the city. Its freakin hard with 40 pounds of gear on you. So I'm like "fuck this shit" I'm hot, hungry, and thirsty. I take all my gear off, I told my LT I did not care. Well a 3 hour patrol turned in to a damn 7 hour patrol. We ended up breaking track again that night, but this time over a sewage pipe that broke. Not funny at the time, and its still not funny.

So we are doing the big operation that was 3 days long, we were clearing out this whole town, door to door. Its July its 140 plus i been walking all day clearing home, onces again I'm hot, hungry, and thirsty. We start getting shot at, I said "fuck this" and sat down on some steps. Well my squad leader joined me to along with every other American Soldier. We just sent the Iraqi Army to go find that bum. Of course we did not find him, that's why I did not waste my time running down the road looking for him. Its was funny how we all got shot at and just walked to these steps that were in the shade.